Unwrapping…Ipsy February 2014

I started subscribing to ipsy in college.  It was kind of my gateway subscription, I think.  And then after about five or six months, I cancelled.


Because how many motherfucking hooker-red lip glosses does a person actually need?  I don’t even like lip gloss.  Its sticky and gross.  I haven’t been in the habit of wearing it since about the seventh grade.  Unhelpful product overload is overload.

On a lark I resubscribed this year.  And so far…four for you, ipsy, you go ipsy.  Not a hooker-red lip gloss in sight.  Keep up this color variety, folks, and I might keep giving you my monies.

And now after that rant..the February roundup!

POP Beauty Plump Pout Mini

Ipsy Feb 14 - POP gloss

See also: my February Birchbox review for how jazzed I am to be getting samples of things that I’ve actually been wanting to try.  Quite a few of the beauty blogs I follow have been raving about this stuff, from how it’s crazy long lasting for a gloss to the fact that the tube is this weird little almost-flat shape that would probably fit into the pockets of those jeans I have with super tiny pockets (as pointed out by the Gentleman, who noted that he can fit two fingers in each, and that’s all.  I’m not sure how this information will ever be relevant, but that’s neither here nor there).

I’ve yet to do the pocket test, since those jeans aren’t exactly work-approved, but I can definitely say that this stuff lasts longer than any other lip gloss I’ve ever come across.

Bonus: its not particularly sticky, and the color I got (“Peony Petal”) is decidedly not hooker-red.

Zoya Nail Polish

Ipsy Feb 14 - Zoya polish

I like this color a lot better on my fingers than I do in the bottle– when I started painting I was expecting a lot paler pigmentation.  But with a second coat it dried to a nice soft pale pink.

Sort of like a baby pig, actually.  Which is a horrible color comparison but whatever, that’s what it looks like.  Its cute, I promise.

The polish itself is a liiittle bit streaky, and I only just did them this morning so I can’t say how long lasting it’ll be.  But I’m optimistic.

City Color Be Matte Blush

Ipsy Feb 14 - Be Matte

Normally I’m not much of a blush person (I’ve spent 22 years loving my pale skin, and I’m pretty content to rock it rouge-less from here on out) but this one, I’m actually pretty okay with.  It blends well, which I think helps a lot, and the pink is again a very soft color once it hits your skin (though it does look a bit bright in the picture).  Approve.

Tini Beauty Eyetini Cordial Cream Shadow & Base In One

Ipsy Feb 14 - Eyetini

Yeah, that’s eyeshadow.  Promise.

These Tini people are a little silly, and I’m mostly okay with it.  Ipsy likes to pop Nailtini stuff in from time to time– I have a killer gold glitter from them from my first round with Ipsy, and a red that could just maybe rival my current go-to (but it won’t, because Head Mistress is the best color ever for a rich red polish and Essie, your naming team deserves an award).  I’ve always been pretty satisfied with the Tini stuff I get, so I was pretty game to give this weird shadow a try.

The applicator is..pretty much a lip gloss applicator, which is really weird and I’m pretty sure the lady on the other side of the mirror at the gym was giving me “what the hell is she doing” looks.  But the shadow itself is pretty solid– there’s primer in the formula, apparently, so the pigment comes through pretty strong and it seems to hold up well.  Plus I’m pretty into the shade.

IPKN NY Moist & Firm BB

Ipsy Feb 14 - BB

..to be fair, I only hated this sample because the shade was COMPLETELY awful.  It went on almost yellow.  What?  Not cool, guys.  I couldn’t even get it to blend in to something decent.  First time I’ve ever just said “fuck it” and thrown a sample out.

Overall: pretty pleased with this month’s bag, above BB cream aside.  Definitely an improvement on previous bags I could mention.


Unwrapping…Ipsy January 2014

I love Ipsy’s packaging– especially in the middle of winter.  How awesome is it to get a BRIGHT FUCKING PINK AND SHINY ENVELOPE in your mailbox?

Ipsy 1.22.14

The most awesome.  That’s how awesome.  The bags inside are usually pretty legit as well, though generally less glitzy.

Not my favorite, but they can't all be winners.

Not my favorite, but they can’t all be winners.

Benefit the PoreFessional ($30)

Benefit - Ipsy 1.22.14

I had a date on Sunday (great timing, since my skin and I had a weekend on the outs) and thought, hey! let’s use some snazzy primer that says it’ll make my pores look better.

Excellent call, B.

I used up the last of my pore-covering skin-awesome-making god-product for New Year’s (I had a Birchbox sample and look at that pricetag I’m sure you get why I’m loathe to buy more) so this was a well-timed sample.  Awesome.  Pores went poof and stayed gone under the tinted moisturizer and powder that got layered over them.

Granted this pricetag isn’t much better, so I’d just better hope one of these boxes pulls through with another pore miracle-worker when this one runs out.

Hint.  Hint.

Malin+Goetz Mojito Lip Balm ($12)

Malin + Goetz - Ipsy 1.22.14

I’m still trying to figure out whether or not I like this or just feel like I should and am using that to cover up actual ambivalence.  It smells really, really good, like you’d want mojito lip balm goo to smell like but without the disappointment that stems from many childhood years of generally misleading flavors that taste mostly like wax.

Pros: above scent approval.  And it really does moisturize well.  Its also a little bit shiny, so it can sort of double as a gloss if that’s your kind of thing.

Cons: it doesn’t seem to last long (maybe that’s just because I drink a lot of stuff during the day and its just rubbing off onto water bottles/coffee cups/etc).  Also, its really sticky.  And because its a tube, you can’t really be ladylike about it.  You’re stuck squirting it onto your finger and rubbing away, and inevitably somebody catches you and you’re left with a bunch of goo on your finger.

I dunno, man.  Jury: out.

yaby Liquid Foundation ($13.55)

Yaby - Ipsy 1.22.14

You might’ve caught in my bit about the PoreFessional that I’m not really a foundation person: tinted moisturizer and light, translucent powder are my go-tos for pretty much everything, with maybe a little extra help underneath if I need it.  So I was actually predisposed to not like this sample.

(Sorry, guys.)

The shade I got wasn’t perfect, and it went on a little thick for me to be able to blend it in well as well as I’d like.  But when I was researching, I figured out that you’re actually supposed to buy multiple shades and then mix them to match your skin tone.  Or..something.  Which, awesome idea!  Custom blended foundation!  If you’re willing to shell out the money to match your skin tone perfectly.

In which case this is great!  But if you’re me and you’re really just happy to use your tinted moisturizer/powder super powered combo..not really so much.

Balanced Guru Balm Me Up Body Balm ($12 for 1 oz, $45 for 4)

Body Balm - Ipsy 1.22.14

This is probably going to make someone out there say “oh ew what is wrong with you” but that person is a snob and I don’t actually care about their opinions.  I forgot to toss my moisturizer in my gym bag Monday morning, and when you have dry skin and its winter..that is a bad thing if you plan to wash your face and not walk outside looking like a crocodile.  Luckily I’d thrown my complete ipsy bag in instead (because..logic, obviously) so I had this on hand and thought “well..it’s supposed to moisturize.  Maybe it’ll be okay.”

I’m not proud.

I kept it really light so as to not go overboard on the shine, and extra light on areas that are prone to shine, and I’m happy to say I made it through the day with no scales and actually not that much shininess.  Something in those oils did a damn good job locking that moisture down, and my face smells vaguely like lemon Pez.  I couldn’t be happier.

Actually, scratch that: I would be much happier if a retail size container of this didn’t cost as much as a week’s worth of gas in my car.

A! Absolute!  Make-Up Cleansing Tissues ($6.99)

Absolute! - Ipsy 1.22.14

They cleaned my face!

..I really don’t know what else to say about them.

Overalldefinitely not the best pack that’s come through my mailbox, that’s for sure.  But I like that this one was a little different than what I usually get from Ipsy– of late they’ve been getting kind of crazy with dark eyeliners and really bright red lip colors (which, fine, I like both of these things but what the hell am I going to do with eight vampy red lipsticks when I already have a favorite in my arsenal?)

So I guess I’m happy.  And my lips taste vaguely of mint.